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11 Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

by Gideon Dosu
11Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

11 Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

11Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

  • Bisi Adewale

Ben graduated as the best graduating student in the whole university garnering a total of 12 awards and securing an International Scholarship to Ph.D. level. He was also given the brightest Star award, given to the best student in Character in every academic year. To crown it up Ben was the President of the Christian fellowship he attends and also the President of the Joint Christian Campus Fellowship. 11Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

The day of his graduation was a glorious day and it ought to have been named as Ben’s Glory day instead of the convocation that the University called it. He was just a 19 year old.

When it was time for him to speak on behalf all graduating students, he took up the microphone, thanked God, whom he called “the giver of wisdom”, thanked his Lecturers and dedicated all the awards to God and his parents. He then demanded that his parents should come out, he handed over all his awards to them thanking them for their love, care, provision, teachings and above all their training and discipline. To the admiration of thousands of people gathered and the millions watching on the National Television, he brought out his own award which he called Parents of the century award and gave it to his elated parents. What a day in the life of his parents!

Journalists later caught up with Ben’s parents for an interview. Some of the things I gleaned from that interview are presented here for you to know how to raise a child of peace that will not give you a heart attack.

Like Ben’s parents, you can avoid having trouble with your children. You can raise Good, Godly and righteous Teenagers. It is possible but you must apply the wisdom of God. You must learn how to be a friend and not just a parent. You have to do the following

1) KNOWLEDGE: Have a deep knowledge of Teens and Teenage life. Speak their languages and come to their level.

2) ACCEPT YOUR CHILD: Your child may not be as brilliant as the child next door, may not be good in athletics as the child of your friend, may not be good in Science or may not be a good artist, accept him and also celebrate him. Don’t ever compare your child with any other child, just the way you will not like to be compared with any other parent.

3) PRAY FOR YOUR CHILD: Be on your knees for your Child. Pray and keep on praying. Plant the seed of righteousness in your Children on your knees.

4) SPEAK ‘TEENISH’: Won’t you be surprised if I tell you that Teens don’t speak the English language? They speak what I call “Teenish”- the language of Teens. You will need to learn this language to operate at the same level with your Teen and prevent trouble with him

“Teenish Language” is full of words like love, romance, friends, friendship, school, music, pleasure, fun, hip pop, celebrity rise, TV, girlfriend, boyfriend, gang, me, sleep, rest, food, Facebook, sex etc. but there are no words like Labor, discipline, hard working, obedience, you, Sacrifice, righteousness, responsibilities etc in its vocabulary. You have to learn how to put the grammar that is lacking in your child’s “Teenish” Language back into it, without which the Child will end up in trouble.

5) MAKE ADEQUATE PROVISION: Try as much as possible to provide for your children. Don’t open them up to fend for themselves at a very tender age. Holiday job they can do, but for them to leave school to provide for themselves may lead to serious trouble for you and them tomorrow. It’s your duty to provide for them. Don’t fail in this regard.

6) BE A FRIEND: Teens are not looking for Directors, Commanders or bosses. They are looking for friends. Are you a friend? You will need to operate with your Teenage child as a friend and lover if you want the best for them.

7) LET THERE BE OPEN COMMUNICATION: Let your Child be Free to talk to you. Don’t terrify him, and don’t close yourself up.

8) CREATE AN ATMOSPHERE OF LOVE: Don’t just love your child in your heart, show him you do. Make your house a home-a place to be -a Garden of Eden. Don’t be harsh on your child. Don’t be difficult and don’t make things difficult for your Child. Don’t terrify your Children. Always remember that if you terrify them when they are young they may terrorize you when you are old.

9) CELEBRATE YOUR CHILD: No matter how big or small the talent in your child is, celebrate them. Say “Thank you”, “I LOVE you”, “You are great”, “You are good”, “That is my boy”, “That is my girl”, “I know you will make it”, “I believe in you” etc.

10) ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOUR CHILD: Always be there for your Children. Be the pillow where they can rest. Have the ear to which they can talk. Allow them to make mistakes without blowing up the roof. Let them be free to you as a friend. Talk in love and relate in wisdom.

Let your Children know Christ early. Spend time with them to make them know Christ. Pray Christ into their hearts.

In addition to these:

PUT THE WORLD OF GOD IN THEM: “Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed thereto according to thy word.”
Psalms 119:9

Give room for adequate Bible study. Take them to Church, and share the word of God personally with them. There is no greater gift you can give to a child than the gift of the Word of God.


Culled from



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11Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

11 Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen

11 Ways To Avoid Having Trouble With Your Teen


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