3 Incredible Family Lessons at UK Immigration
My plane arrived Heathrow for the out of the box Parenting 1:0 early this morning at exactly 4:35 am but did not complete the immigration process until about 7 am.
I am sure you must be wondering what could have happened, right? I was already boiling within but had to calm down when I discovered I’d never pick any lesson in a disempowered state so I quickly switched to my resourceful state to be able to pick the lessons life was trying to teach me.
I noticed that not everyone that arrived went through the stress we had to go through. As a matter of fact, the UK and EU citizens spent less than 10mins to complete their process thanks to the self-help system they now have. For those that chose to use the counter, there were more than enough immigration officers to attend to them, unfortunately, that was not the story with the non-EU citizens where there were only I officials on duty trying to attend to over 150 people on a queue that kept growing longer.
If you know me too well and my disposition to family systems engineering, you’d almost bet that I would pick the critical lessons using my FSE lense and here are my lessons:
1. Your family is a nation & you must prioritize your citizens – As far as the UK is concerned family is family and everyone else is a suspect and they are not emotional about it. How often do we prioritize non-citizens of our family because we are emotional. In many cases, friends and relations whose values we have not passed through an unbiased filter. There is no serious nation that becomes emotional about non-citizens irrespective of how much they were bringing into their economy and no serious nation makes life difficult for her citizens.
Have you made life easy for your citizens or you are a threat to their mental well-being?
2. Once your entry system is porous your family becomes susceptible to terrorists – The UK government understands that the most critical aspects of your life are the entry and the exit systems and they have created a system that ensures they are able to properly screen everyone that comes into their territory. They did not consider the long queue and the fact that we had been standing for close to two hours. They stick to their process and did not rush things. How tight is the entry and the exit systems in your home? How easy is it for village people or folks to show up in your family and become permanent residents even when your spouse is against that idea?
3. You have a right to reject interested visitors and you must not feel bad for rejecting their entry visa – There was no single UK citizen that was turned back at the entry port but I noticed a number of non-UK/EU citizens whose entry was declined and had to face deportation. I would never know why but that was one critical lesson for me again because a system must never be emotional. Many people have opened their homes to folks who ended up becoming domestic terrorists to their wellness while some others have sexually molested innocent kids.
We are not asking you not to be nice but have you done your due diligence on who you are bringing in? That they show up at your door is not enough reason to grant them entry. There are options that may serve your nation better and protect your citizens. You must never think of yourself alone in taking decisions that affect your family; think of the general well-being of the citizens of your nation.
In Family Systems Engineering, we speak a lot about family immigration system and I observed it first-hand today and while I felt back that I was left standing for hours simply because I was trying to get into a nation that should be excited to see me the nation was not emotional about what they needed to do to secure the wellness of their citizens.
Your family is a nation and you can’t be emotional about your immigration systems that require logic lest you hurt your citizens and ultimately your nation.
I honour you