4 Signs That You and Your Husband Are Not Communicating Correctly
I like to repeat that it takes strategies to develop a good relationship. And I justify it: we prepare for a test, to go up to work, to better develop our jobs, for any and all kinds of promotion in life, but we do not often realize that we need to prepare ourselves to maintain good relationships. The simplistic way of conceptualizing a relationship worked out is not totally incoherent with the complexity of the issue.
One of the biggest problems I encounterd with several couples is the failure to communicate. By the way, I can say that this is the heart of the matter, after all, once the channels of communication are unlocked the understanding happens.
Some signs make it clear that the communication between you and your husband is truncated:
1. There is no interaction
If you just speak what needs to be said, without exchanging ideas, you do not agree and do not even disagree with each other, so there is no interaction between you.
Speaking is not talking, dialogue presupposes exchange, sharing, that is, you speak, it responds and vice versa. I have heard many couples complain that they do not even fight anymore, that is, nothing else is shared. Now, to interact is to relate really, it represents the integrated action among the people.
2. You say one thing and he understands another
You do not feel heard by your husband, he seems to always be somewhere else. It is not pleasant to tell someone about our day, for example, and realize that we are not being heard. Worse still is when everything we speak is understood pejoratively and causes conflict.
Believe me, in those cases, it is very likely that your husband is feeling the same way. You can not hear each other and this increases the distance even further. The tendency is for you to talk less and it to move away in the same proportion.
3. You try to guess his feelings
It really is a clear sign that a couple does not communicate well when they are constantly trying to figure out what the other is saying. Because they do not cultivate a real dialogue, they draw conclusions early and, almost always, they end up misunderstanding.
In the process of Conflict Mediation with couples it is very common that at some point one tells the other, “But I did not know you felt that way” or “You never told me that.” From there the channels of communication begin to redo each other.
4. Are you afraid to speak?
It is very clear the lack of understanding when you do not feel comfortable talking about something with your husband. It seems like you “step on eggs”, always afraid of the subject becoming a fight.
You simply can not speak clearly and make it worse by creating subterfuge or, worse, omit important things from life together. She ends up trying to solve everything by herself and feels suffocated as if she “carries the world on her back”.
The foundation of a good relationship is being able to talk to someone about anything and everything. It is the dialogue that promotes the understanding and trust that healthy relationships enhance. Want to achieve excellence? Talk, get involved, commit yourself!
Article by Akinbode Toluleke check up Twitter on taakinbode
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