After our wedding, honeymoon started in full gear, Onitemi and I were ready for this aspect of married life, no fear of being caught in sin, no thought of unwanted pregnancy, no inhibition whatsoever, no we didn’t travel to a resort(we weren’t buoyant enough ), it was a borrowed flat but we were too busy exploring each other’s bodies to notice the difference. It would be an understatement to say the honeymoon was indeed full of “honey”, we only paused to eat and have our baths when necessary, no we didn’t pray for hours, that was done before the wedding. This continued for almost a month ( too many styles to try ) when hubby had to resume work.
I gave birth 9 months after and libido took a drastic fall, after taking care of the baby and doing house chores all I want to do is sleep, hubby has to do lots of cajoling and “Orisirisi” to get my attention and it has to be a quick one. Baby has interrupted our blues with his own reggae, sex wasn’t the same again. I pity hubby more because I know he won’t cheat and I won’t cheat but do we want to subject ourselves to the punishment of binding and casting demons of sexual temptations? then I got thinking, our marriage is just 4 years, is this how this thing will just disappear like that? No wonder we have pastors and deacons committing adultery damning the consequences because my brothers and sisters body no be firewood and we all sit quietly in church failing to address this critical issue that affects both young and old.
I was studying my Bible this morning when I stumbled on this.
Your wife is like a well, your own personal well dug in your compound, it is not always full of water, it might even dry up during the dry season, If you go and fetch water from your neighbour’s well, it’s either it is locked or almost dry, and the community well is drawn by every dick and Harry with different ‘doro’ (fetching bucket ) which contaminates the water and poses a danger to you and your family, only foolish men will go that way, what then do you do? You go back to your own dry well and blast it (employ all techniques ) or have labor men (gifts, romance, attention etc) to dig deeper until they find water, then caste it, cover it and lock it with padlock for your use alone. I got this from Proverbs 5:15-18 “drink waters out of your own cistern ( of a pure marriage relationship ), and fresh running waters out of your own well. Should your offspring be dispersed abroad as water brooks in the streets? (confine yourself to your own wife )……… Let your fountain be blessed ( with the rewards of fidelity ), and rejoice in the wife of your youth. AMP.
Are you committing adultery? It’s time to go back to your well, do the needful, rid yourself of all contacts with community Wells, tend to your own well and take your fill when needed.
You are not committing adultery yet but your well is running low and almost dry, refill it with lots of love, honest communication and attention, don’t leave it unattended for too long so you don’t lose taste for it. Shalom!
N. B hubby and I have regained our blues.