The Good Time of Engagement: 13 Tips on Advantages and Preparation
Marriage should not be based on a rapturous and impulsive relationship. To have a successful relationship, you must live one step at a time: dating, engagement and marriage.
Dating is a wonderful time in life. It is when a couple, who nurtures special feelings for one another, decides to stay together because they believe that the relationship can work.
It is in the courtship that the boy and the girl begin to express their feelings through romanticism and delicacy. It is when they come to know each other better, to better understand one another’s feelings, to learn to deal with the temperament and diverse circumstances that surround the couple and their families.
When dating becomes stronger and the couple realizes that they have found the person they want to live with forever, another important step is taken: engagement.
Engagement is and should be treated as a special time. It is during this period that the couple are preparing themselves for marriage.
What are the advantages of engagement?
The engagement is a public statement that the couple has made a commitment to stay together.
An alliance on the finger can avoid embarrassing situations, such as flirting or inviting by a third person.
It is a special time of preparation for the couple, in which both can sit and discuss freely about their dreams, desires and expectations regarding the future.
What kind of preparation should be done during the engagement?
1. Spiritual preparation
If the couple is to marry in the church, the synagogue, the mosque, or the Temple, he must be fit and dignified to make sacred covenants before the altar. You must be fulfilling the commandments and requirements as required by your religion.
2. Read books together
Books that will help them better understand married life, the responsibilities assumed with marriage, parenting, financial management, etc.
3. Clarify your doubts about marital intimacy
Because we advocate sex only among married people, a couple is expected to wait until marriage to discover each other’s intimacy.
Still, they will be able to talk to their parents, or other responsible adults, about some doubts they have about this beautiful and sacred moment.
4. Take specific courses
Some religions offer courses for singles or grooms who want to better understand or assume the responsibilities inherent in marriage.
5. Agree on how many children to have
6. Define well the roles of husband and wife
Decisions about the roles of each one within the home.
7. Define the rules that will apply in your home
8. Make spiritual goals for the couple and their future family
9. Time goals
Concerning studies, work, personal and family growth.
10. Short-term financial planning
One should make a survey of all the immediate expenses of the wedding, such as party, honeymoon, rent and initial expenses.
It is decided how much each person can contribute to these expenses and to a reserve that will cover expenses in the first couple months.
11. Medium-term financial planning
It is extremely necessary to prepare a budget , after the marriage, which should contain the couple’s total income and all the items that make up their cost of living.
12. Long-term financial planning
Financial planning is a question that should be very important in preparing the couple
Percentages are defined on the income that can be saved for the future. How much they will need to earn to finance a home, car and formal education?
Considering that most, if not most, divorces are caused by problems of financial origin, financial planning is a matter that should weigh heavily in the preparation of the couple. Divorce is never a way out of this at all.
13. Emergency Preparedness
The couple needs to think about everything, including unemployment, illness or other adverse situations they may face. For this, in addition to the financial reserve, can set goals such as storing food , plant a vegetable garden and take out life insurance .
Engagement is not an old-fashioned or outdated tradition. It is a beautiful and very useful period. It is a special moment when the “cards are put on the table” and the couple decides what kind of life they intend to have after they are married.
This is a necessary time of preparation because it avoids unpleasant surprises and selfish attitudes, or others that meet the couple’s common goals, which could hinder marital growth and happiness.
