Things You Need To Know About Divorce As A Christian
This is a controversial subject, but necessary to be addressed, since many divorced people need to know how their situation is before God, and others want to know what would happen if they left the hell they live in.
1. People can change
We have only control over what we ourselves do, never about the other. People can change, for better or for worse.
Imagine yourself in the following situation: In the beginning your spouse was loving, faithful to you and faithful to God. But something happened and he turned his head. What guilty do you have of having married someone you decided to change?
Are you guilty for not praying enough for your spouse to be what you used to be? No way! You should never accept being held responsible for anything that is beyond your control. Each one is responsible for his own actions.
Did you become an unbearable person, so he has changed? In this case, you need to strive to improve, otherwise you will be as much accountable to God for the destruction of your family. Even so, that does not give you the right to assault you.
He needs to exercise self-control; he needs to know that nothing justifies a violent reaction. But if you have become a totally difficult person to live with – and do not want to change – it is he who has the right to leave this marriage, not to use coercion with a means of trying to correct you.
2. People try to look better or different than they are when they want to win someone’s heart.
Who has never tried to look much better in the presence of those who love them? Or he made an honest effort to improve because of someone. This is a sign that the person you fell in love inspires you to do good things and to become better.
But sadly, some of these people simply give up persevering, weary of fighting their weaknesses and turning away from God. And end up giving vent to your worst feelings.
There are people with rebellious and aggressive temper. If, with the help of the Lord, it is already difficult to fight against your weaknesses, imagine without Him. So how can you stand beside an aggressive spouse who has tired of struggling against his tendency to commit abuses? And, worst of all, he turned away from the one who could most help him – the Lord?
There are also cases of homosexual male and female Christians who have married someone of the opposite sex to see what they are going to do, or to be a commandment, or just to meet the expectations of the family and church people.
They may even have struggled to love their spouse, but they end up giving up fighting their instincts and weaknesses. Is the person obligated to maintain a bond with him to the death?
3. Some people wear masks
Unfortunately, any of us can fall victim to a covert person or even to a personality disorder such as psychopathy. She does everything to win it. And with that purpose, try to convince him that he is a wonderful person, very correct. She is an expert at pretending.
And you, as a good Christian you are, believe in her. You may even feel strange sometimes, but you are afraid to judge it unfairly. The person fulfills all the requirements that you seek. And when she finds out who she really is, it’s too late, they are already married.
4. God does not violate anyone’s will – the person only changes if he wishes
I fully rely on the power of God! I know that miracles happen when we pray, fast, and work hard to improve marriage. But there is a law in the heavens and the earth, from the beginning, instituted by the Lord Himself: man’s agency can not be violated, not even by God.
So He can even interfere in some way by putting obstacles in the way of that person to see if he wakes up for the evil he is committing, but will never force him to change.
Therefore, the change of the spouse does not depend on how much faith your husband and wife exercises in your favor. It’s a personal decision. And many decide not to improve.
Empathy needs to be
Friends, let us be empathic with those who are suffering in an abusive relationship! If your marriage is going well, great! I wish everyone was like that! But within many Christian homes there are spouses and children who wet their pillows at night praying to God to end their suffering.
They just need to know that God weeps with them and wants them to know that YES, they can get out of the terrible situation they are living in without feeling guilty.
If they have done everything that was within their reach and nothing has changed, they are free to follow their life, away from that cruel person who is causing him so much pain!
The world is spinning so many times! Many who throw stones and show no compassion for those who suffer today are strong candidates to go through that tomorrow. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy (Matthew 5: 7).
Realize that at no time is it being affirmed that God approves of divorce for any reason, such as incompatibility of geniuses, or withdrawal from one another, or weakening of love, especially when there are children involved.
Such things can be solved with a good deal of mutual effort. But only serious circumstances, especially after having exhausted all means of remedying it.
Article by Akinbode Toluleke check up Twitter on taakinbode
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