In a development stirring conversations across social media and family circles, Pastor Amose Fenwa, a well-known Christian leader and General Overseer of HolyGhost Christian Centre, has officially remarried. The news has attracted widespread attention, drawing both support and criticism from the public. In response to the heated debates, renowned family life coach and marriage expert, Bisi Adewale, has addressed the situation, offering his perspective and a word of wisdom to critics and supporters alike.
When Can a Christian Remarry After the Demise of a Spouse?
By Bisi Adewale
There has been a lot of noise on the internet since last week following the announcement that Dr. Amos Fenwa, General Overseer of Holy Ghost Christian Centre, has remarried.
Dr. Fenwa lost his dear wife, Esther Fenwa, in May 2023. She was 57 years old, and they had spent 33 years together in marriage, ministry, and purpose. On Thursday, July 17, 2025 two years and two months after her passing. He began a new chapter of his life in holy matrimony with Fela, his new bride. The marriage was officiated by Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo, founder of Kingsway International Christian Centre (KICC).
As expected, the internet exploded with mixed reactions. Some celebrated his courage to love again. Others, sadly, made snide remarks, claiming the marriage came “too soon” after his wife’s death.
In light of these reactions, it is necessary to address this matter biblically, professionally, and compassionately. As someone who has spent over two decades counseling grieving spouses, restoring broken hearts, and building strong marriages, I feel compelled to speak truth to confusion and grace to judgment.
What Does the Bible Say About Remarriage After the Death of a Spouse?
Let us begin with the Word of God, not cultural opinion or emotional sentiment.
Romans 7:2-3 says, “For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.” Also,
1 Corinthians 7:39 states, “The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.”
The Bible is clear: the death of a spouse ends the marital covenant. The surviving partner is free to remarry. This is not a sin. It is not betrayal. It is biblical liberty. In fact, in 1 Timothy 5:14, Apostle Paul encourages younger widows to remarry. It is not just permitted; in some situations, it is recommended.
The Real-Life Struggles Widows and Widowers, Especially Leaders, Face
Let us be honest. Losing a spouse is one of the deepest wounds a human being can experience. It affects every part of a person’s life, spiritually, emotionally, physically, and mentally. For leaders, the battle is even more intense.
While their pulpits are full, their homes are silent. They preach to thousands but return to an empty bed. The woman who used to prepare their meals, listen to their struggles, pray with them, and share their secrets is gone. The loneliness is painful and often invisible.
Moreover, seduction and temptation become real threats. Many female followers or church workers, under the guise of offering support, begin to cross boundaries. I have counseled widowed pastors who struggled with sexual temptation, emotional entanglements, and even moral failures. Some fell into relationships they never intended, simply because they delayed remarrying due to public pressure.
Dr. Fenwa did not make this mistake. He mourned with dignity, waited two years and two months, sought godly counsel, and was joined in marriage by a spiritual father. That is wisdom and maturity, not haste or disrespect.
What Is an Acceptable Mourning Period?
Biblically, mourning periods varied. The Israelites mourned Moses for 30 days (Deuteronomy 34:8). Aaron was mourned for 30 days (Numbers 20:29). In Jewish tradition, mourning a spouse could last up to one year. Even in African culture, a one-year mourning period is considered sufficient.
Dr. Fenwa waited more than two years. That surpasses both biblical and cultural expectations. Why then the outrage? Because many people respond from emotion and tradition not Scripture and common sense.
To Widows and Widowers: How to Start a New Life in Remarriage
If you are a widow or widower and God is leading you into a new relationship, here is my counsel.
First, grieve deeply and intentionally. Healing is not something you rush, but do not let public opinion delay your restoration. Too much delay can lead to emotional emptiness, depression, and even sin.
Second, do not compare your new spouse to your late partner. Your new spouse is not a replacement. They are a new gift for a new season. Comparing them will destroy the beauty of your new home. Honour your past, but embrace your present.
Third, be honest and open. Talk about your grief, your fears, your expectations, and your needs. Let your new spouse understand your journey. Walk together with transparency.
Finally, build fresh memories. Don’t try to copy the past. Don’t force your new marriage to look like your old one. Begin anew.
To the Public and the Church: Let Us Stop Judging Healing Hearts
Romans 14:4 asks, “Who are you to judge another man’s servant?” Ecclesiastes 3:4 reminds us that there is a time to mourn and a time to dance. If a man or woman has mourned, healed, and chosen to move forward in love, we ought to celebrate, not criticize.
When people grieve, we must stand by them. And when they rise again, we must not try to drag them back into mourning.
Final Thoughts
To every widow and widower reading this: You are not doing wrong by loving again. You are not betraying your late spouse by moving on. You are not weak, you are strong for allowing God to restore your joy.
And to everyone else: Let us choose compassion over criticism, support over suspicion, and Scripture over tradition. Let us be the kind of people who lift others up, not tear them down.
To Dr. Amos Fenwa and his new wife Fela, congratulations. Your new beginning is a testimony to the healing grace of God. May your union be filled with peace, joy, purpose, and divine favour.
Bisi Adewale
Marriage Clinician | Family Coach | Author
Facebook.com/pastorbisiadewale
IG@bisiadewale
READ: Pastor Amos Fenwa Remarries Two Years After Wife’s Death
